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Before You Call a Divorce Lawyer, Find Out if that’s the Right First Choice for Your Family

Oct 08, 2019

Usually with divorce, the first step we see a person take is to call a lawyer. The rationale: to protect one’s legal rights and to ensure a fair outcome.

Very few people facing divorce will get advice as to the other paths – not court, not lawyers (immediately) – that are available to get divorced, or to ask what each path costs before deciding the best course of action.

People need to gather this information so they can make informed decisions. They need to hire the right professional at the right time - and that professional might not be a lawyer to start.

It is their family who will be harmed if a large percentage of their savings is spent on divorce.

We don’t buy a car or make an offer on a house without knowing what the asking price is, or what the features are. For some reason, with divorce, people give away their power.

I’m giving power back to parents.

Traditionally there are four paths to divorce:

  • mediation

  • collaborative law

  • arbitration

  • and litigation (court).

Here is a chart of the average cost per person for each path, in the “low conflict” and “high conflict streams.”

As these are per person averages, if parents want to know the cost per family, the amounts must be doubled.

Doing this, we see the family averages are:


  • Low Conflict: $ 12,690

  • High Conflict: $ 62,280

Collaborative Law

  • Low Conflict: $ 12,538

  • High Conflict: $ 50,220


  • Low Conflict: $ 24,656

  • High Conflict: $ 80,214

Litigation (Court)

  • Low Conflict: $ 24,790

  • High Conflict: $ 108,780

These dollar amounts are averages. In the study I looked at to obtain these numbers, the highest amount paid by an individual (so half the cost) to litigate to divorce, was $625,000.

Our children deserve better.

Isn’t it better for parents to have money to spend on their children, instead of spending it to determine their legal rights? 

If you want to learn more about these paths, or about the path to peaceful divorce I have created, one that enables parents to create fair solutions that are family-focused, even in situations where one would expect high conflict (such as infidelity, business valuations, and mental illness) and to engage professionals at the time that is best for each family, please get in touch or book a FREE 20 minute Drama-Free Divorce Discovery Session.

Choose Peace.

Sign up now for Kim's free "Divorce Script" and plan how to tell your spouse you want a divorce. 

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